So as some of you may or may not know, I work in a library. A public small town library. I'm sure some of you are thinking right now that, 'Oh she's so lucky to be able to work in such a neat place'. If you are you're probably also assuming that the type of people who frequent a library are all intelligent classy people with morals and manners.
For those of you who have ever worked in retail or any sort of service industry, you'll know what I'm talking about here. You know those frequent customers, you know the ones. The customers you hide from when you see them coming in the door. The ones you beg/bribe your co-workers to take so you don't have to deal with the bitchyness/stupidity/stench/rage. You know THOSE guys. Well when they're not in your store/restaurant/whatever they're here, at the library. Making my life HELL!!!! Some examples.
Mr. Stinky-Pants: The name speaks for itself. The man reeks! He smells like poop, B.O., and rotting meat. His hair is greasy and long, his beard is scraggly and he is disgusting. He is not the only stinky patron we have but he is by far the worst. And he touches everything! Leaving greasy smears on books, counter tops, and all over the computer he's using. As soon as he's out the door we break out the Lysol and Febreeze and scrub down everything. Gah!!! I need Bleach here STAT!!
Psycho Mom: Again self-explanitory. This Mom is bat-shit crazy I'm-gonna-eat-your-face-and-make-wind-chimes-out-of-your-bones CRAZY! And she's raising her kids to be the exact same way. When she comes in she demands that we turn the computers off because they will corrupt her children with their evil ways. When we say we can't she goes off on this rant on how electricity is corrupting today's youth and that her children will have no part of it. She does it every F*^%ing time she comes in... EVERY TIME!
The Bird- This guy like to whistle loudly all the time in the library. We ask him to stop repeatedly and he'll stop... for like a minute then he's at it again, until finally we have to ask him to leave. >.<
The Cookbook Jizzer- We don't actually know who this guy is, we only know him by the salty leavings he spreads all over the cookbooks. Why the cookbooks? Who knows, maybe he's got a thing for smoked meat. Or maybe it's because the cookbook section is the only place in the library that completely isolated and he takes advantage of the solitude. Either way I don't get paid enough to clean that gunk up